Facade

                                              (geckoandfly)

Putting up a front is done by people to protect themselves from the judgmental eye of others. This is actually a common thing we usually do to conceal the real us because we are afraid to be identified by our weaknesses. We dislike being seen completely. We wear masks because of fear. There are instances that we are also insecure to the point that we wear masks so thick we often get smothered by them. Those who project as bullies and snobs are actually unsure of their power.

Susan Sparks mentioned that most of the common reasons we wear masks is the Impostor Syndrome - this is the fear that the world is going to find us out. Since it is human nature to be accepted, we tend to project ourselves to what is socially-acceptable among our peers so to be IN. Social-climbing is a common act so for others to accept you to be one of "them". There are lots of people who feign wealth and resources so to belong!

Then, if we think that the world does not love us, we put on anger as the one to cover us. We are always angry on everything. We do not see any beauty around us. We complain a lot. It is difficult for us to appreciate anything since the universe seem NOT to do that to us. We cover our selves with bitterness since the world seem to conspire against us. We do not get what we want. So, we better fight back! It is wise then to put on an armor or ANGER, COMPLAINTS and all the NEGATIVE things to conceal the real us - insecure.

Envy, the green-faced monster, often plays a great role why people hide behind a facade. We see that we are not at par with our friends that we need to project an image of being equal with them. We even mask our financial stability by incurring debts to pay for the lifestyles we really could not afford. We have to so  not to look pitiful.

Lampkin (2014) mentioned that putting up a front is more harmful than helpful because someone can only hide who they really are for some time. At a certain point, the real person is going to show up. This is also the point when trust is going to be put at stake. Others would soon dislike the inner person since they were being tricked by the superficial one. Most of our companions would feel a sense of disconnect to the person they have trusted when in fact another person is hiding behind the bushes.

So, it is better for us to accept our limitations than put up a front. It is a difficult thing since human nature dictates us to use the survival of the fittest theory. But then, accepting our limitations is actually liberating and empowering. We are not all-knowing and all-powerful. We then could open the possibility to link with others for help. We could build relationships founded on trust. We do not have to be somebody else just to be liked. We could be who we are and co-exist.

Accepting our limitations is actually not giving up. According to Hexter (2013), it is actually saying, “Here is what I cannot do, and could not become, but these are things I will work out to learn. This is when we stop comparing ourselves to others, and start focusing on your own gifts and strengths. This is even the time opening ourselves to teamwork since we are now courageous to link with others and allow them to help us attain our goals since there are some things that we could NOT really do.

Then, what is the danger if we insist on dwelling on pretense?

Look around you. You can see people who are like that. They project to be  kind, happy or functionally-upright individuals but in reality they are reeking with garbage. They are constantly unhappy since they are victimized by their own pretense, prejudice and insecurities. We could avoid them since it their choice to be like that. In the end, they will reap their own rotten fruits.

We continue to be REAL. By conforming the the laws of the land and the divine and consistently working our ways towards the common good, we will harvest PEACE and our own concept of happiness. 

We live. We love.