Bigot

Di na makakita. There are many instances when people wonder what happened with their friends and acquaintance who could not “see” them anymore. It seems that they have become invisible to the eyes of others. People change, alright, but to be gracious enough in greeting others despite the status or whatever caused the confidence could be deemed unusual if not abnormal in some ways.

According to www.learning-mind.com, features of egotistical behavior are a tendency to talk about oneself all the time and a lack of humility. What then, is egocentric? Everyone is self-centered at times. It refers to a limited worldview, with a person focusing only on his needs. An egocentric person may become obsessed with them. Egocentric people often show a lack of empathy for others. They cannot see things from a different point of view than their own.

When a person start NOT to care for others and feel NOTHING towards them except contempt, these ones are edging towards being egocentric. They start not liking others to the point that affiliating with the “unwanted” seem to be a stressful task to do. They then see others as “different; of low quality and forgettable!”

Psychological egoism (Chung, 2016) is a view that claims that all human actions are motivated, at bottom, exclusively by one’s self-interest; it claims that everybody, in the end, is an egoist. This is a very strong claim. It does not merely claim that only some or the majority of human actions are generated from considerations of self-interest; but rather that all human actions – including the ones that apparently seem to be acts of benevolence as well as those acts that seemingly stem from one’s moral conviction – are ultimately motivated solely by a concern for one’s own exclusive personal good.

But then, we have the capacity to weigh things and draw a line between being ethical and being abnormally egoistic. That is the reason why reflections are encouraged by the sages and psychologists for us to be able to evaluate our inner drives, motivations and the inclinations of our dark half.

Others link with the powerful and the rich for the benefit of getting something. They look down on the poor and the helpless and place them on the margins. There are those who affiliate with the good-looking ones and bully the “ugly” group. They seem to draw some sort of energy from the attention they get for being with the IN crowd. They benefit from the actions they have chosen to do.

But isn’t it also rewarding for the SELF to love and embrace all people? Being with the marginalized group and helping them out could be meaningful and rewarding. Choosing to be affectionate could be beneficial to the SELF as well. That is the thin line between being able to understand and being a bigot. Ethical egoism must prevail in us rather than that of unhealthy one. We understand that we need each other. We just do not label ourselves so to be able to thrive. The rich and the poor; the beautiful and the ugly have things which could be shared to us…and vice versa.

Ethical egoism is often equated with selfishness, the disregard of others’ interests in favor of one’s own interests. However, ethical egoism cannot be coherently equated with selfishness because it is often in one’s self-interest to help others or to refrain from harming them (Rand, 2017).

Things like these could be cranial and stressful to some. But it has to reach our consciousness since we are the captain of our ships. We need to understand our own selves rather than dismiss such thoughts since we need to radiate knowledge and values to our small and big communities.

In this world being mandated by material things, it is but proper to touch base with our spirits rather than NOT being able to identify the real us and continue to thirst for things which are not meaningful and substantial.

We do not have to close our eyes to others. We have to look at them and SEE OURSELVES from their strengths and frailties.

Laizzes-faire

Way pakialam. There are instances when one would wonder why some people are so cool in frantic situations. In the workplace, there are those who are neck-deep with their tasks but there are those who are just so passive they still have the time to retouch their makeup and check on their phones. They seem to be indifferent with the pressing needs one will wonder about their work orientation.

Personal ethics are defined as moral objectives or values that one believe in and practice as part of his/her life’s philosophy. When it comes to work, one’s ethics also encompass one’s overall attitude about work. One definition of a person with good work ethics is a person who shows up on time with the willingness to do what it takes to get the job done without complaint (Brenner, 2014).

In public service, it is a necessity for the servant to exhaust his/her best for the interest of the public. Yet, it is saddening to notice that those who pledge to be of service to people are the ones who want to be served. There are even those who do not exhaust all the resources to be able to make a dent on the pressing needs. There seems to be a drone of indifference in their surroundings to the point that the workplace seems to have a flat line.

What is the motivation behind this?

Recent research from the Corporate Advisory Board shows that 90 percent of employees are not engaged or their behavior is not aligned with organizational goals. Certainly, the unproductivity have contributed to this state of malaise in the workplace. It’s not the only cause, however. Jealousies, personal rivalries, silo behavior, and incivility have also harmed the spirits of people at work. The primary culprit is indifference (Stallard, 2018).

Such reveries were triggered when this writer noticed that there are those who evade their tasks and justify them with other assignments. The Civil Service Commission has worked hard to underscore that there are job descriptions and expected Key Result Areas (KRA) among the public servants. A teacher’s KRA is to facilitate the teaching-learning process. Yet, there are those who justify themselves by saying they are being ordered to decorate the stage leaving the learners behind. There are officials in the local offices who only come to the office for attendance then go out for other tasks leaving their key result areas to nothing in exchange of other trivial acts.

Sometimes, the cause of such misalignments is also the head of the workplace. The subordinates could only follow the orders of the bosses since the leaders delegate their tasks to members. Again, the subject of being indifferent could be the culprit here. There are those in higher positions whose mantra is delegation even if they do not have anything on their hands.

Delegating tasks and responsibility is a vital component of time management according to Virtual Advisor Inc. (2014). The primary reason most people delegate is to decrease their workload, which enables them to focus on other tasks and responsibilities. Other reasons to delegate include improved staff satisfaction, better ability to get an increased amount of work done, and faster career growth for the supervisor and the employee who completes the project. Not only does the supervisor's workload decrease, but his staff members also have the opportunity to advance. When delegation is effective, the entire team and the business itself can succeed.

That is the real reason of delegation NOT that the manager or leader could sit back and relax.

It is disheartening to realize that productivity and the delivery of services in the government offices fall short. Of course, there are those who do their tasks well but there is also a percentage of people who shortchange the expected outcomes of the offices and departments. This is the main reason why inefficiency is cascaded to the roots of our culture. And when we tell things like this, we are always be the one to be criticized. We will be called self-righteous and those slow-workers will then accuse us of other things to discredit our personalities.

The only thing to do is by continuing to enrich our work ethics and do our tasks efficiently. We then continue to displace effective outputs to inspire others. We should anchor our actions to our MISSION. 

Excellent workers consider their own outputs and do not compare them to others. In their own ways, they always win their daily battles.

Pompous

Way makalupos. We have encountered people who do not consider defeat. They always complain in competitions as if they are always the best and could not be defeated. They always dominate discussions and think that their ideas are of importance than others. They walk out on events if these are not centered to them. They are very competitive that the concept of learning from mistakes is alien.

Competitive people do whatever it takes to fulfill their desires to keep up with status, winning at sports, board games and even the lottery. These types of people are very confident in themselves and the law of attraction are key elements to having a winning attitude and doing better than most everyone else. These people are being labeled as conceited, self-absorbed, too picky, full of themselves and not being flexible and sometimes passive aggressive (Benimati, 2017).

When you are with such personalities, you oftentimes get stressed or would want to breathe some fresh air. There is a compulsion to go away since there might come a time that your social etiquette would be fouled when you give retorts and create an argument which you could never win. They will make their own stands even if they already know that they are NOT correct. Again, they do not want defeat.

Research studies suggest that there are different kinds of self-esteem. Some people may have a secure sense of self, regardless of the situation, whereas others may have unstable or fragile self-esteem that varies depending on their last accomplishment or whom they are able to impress. When they are doing well, they feel great and even superior to others, whereas when they encounter setbacks, they tend to feel shame and self-doubt. This results in anxiety and vigilance around social status and performance. They have to keep comparing themselves to others to make sure they are measuring up and haven't fallen behind (Greenberg, 2011).

What made them?

Greenberg continued that these types have a survival mentality and may be jealous and controlling. The basis for this is often a deep insecurity about having their emotional needs met. They may have had parents who were critical, played favorites, or were unavailable or inattentive to their emotional needs.

Some competitive people may be pathologically narcissistic and self-centered, not seeing you as a separate human being, but more as a reflection or extension of themselves, a source of admiration for their accomplishments, a potential threat to their own success, or as an object to use or manipulate in order to meet their own needs or increase their resources.

Generally, people who are competitive about their houses, kids, dinner parties and so on are either insecure or arrogant and want to prove superiority. If they are the insecure type, praising their accomplishments and staying calm and friendly may make them see you as an ally or as less of a threat. If they are arrogant, you may want to speak up and toot your own horn as well or change the subject when they start boasting. Arrogant people tend to be narcissistic and status-conscious, so if you exude confidence and appear to have high status and accomplishments, they are more likely to respect you.

But then, these areas of encounters could be wearisome. We are free to choose whom to affiliate with. We could not concede to their illnesses all the time and consider our own space as well. We are not obliged to praise them and tell them things to widen their ego. We have our own lives to live we could let them live their own pathetic ways.

Yet, we have our social responsibilities as well. We nurture children for them to grow loved and respected. We displace care and affection to create wider areas of positive energies. We revisit our personalities for us to monitor and evaluate our inner battles and heal the wounded child within.

But if we can’t; if we continue to compete in an unhealthy manner, we must endure the brand of being UNSTABLE. “Way gajod makalupos kay...(silently circles the forefinger on the side of the head)”