You Want To Be the Boss?

                                             (img: onmogul.com)

Di mahibayo mangamo. It is a sad thing that others did not reach the position that they aspired. They wanted to be the one to man a group but they were not blessed with the opportunity to be the boss. Yet, their hunger to be the one to direct people overpowers their  sanity to the point that they often have problems with both the authorities and with their companions.

For adults, attention-seeking behavior is a conscious or unconscious attempt to become the center of attention, sometimes to gain validation or admiration. According to the National Library of Medicine, histrionic personality disorder is characterized by feeling underappreciated when not the center of attention.

Since the person is probably not equipped with competence and the necessary behavior to become a leader or being the boss, the conscious and unconscious behavior to compete with the appointed or designated leader is intense. He or she will try to look for the weakness of the present boss and highlight this in his and her words around to gain sympathy. The person will even resort to perform character assassination so that he or she may sound right.

A persistent pattern of anger, defiance, and vindictiveness against authority figures could be a sign of oppositional defiant disorder (ODD). It is a behavioral disorder that results in defiance and anger against authority. It can affect a person’s work, school, and social life (Gotter, 2018).

According to Healthline, there is no proven cause of ODD, but there are theories that can help identify potential causes. It is thought a combination of environmental, biological, and psychological factors cause ODD. For example, it’s more common in families with a history of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

It is also possible that ODD develops as a result of learned behaviors, reflecting negative reinforcement methods some authority figures and parents use. This is especially true if the child uses bad behavior to get attention. In other cases, the child could adopt negative behaviors from a parent.

So, if you noticed that you have a problem with your boss and you feel that you are better that him, try to reflect on the genetic history of your family or remember the way your parents raised you in terms of the way they impose authority over you. This might help you to understand your behavior and start taking control over that behavior not on the roles of other persons.

Also, some people are predisposed to “control aversion” given their neurological structure, according to a study published in the Journal of Neuroscience. The control averse doesn’t like it when others hold sway over their decisions and actions and feel strongly inclined to rebel. This tendency is linked to strong brain connectivity between the parietal lobule and dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, two regions “commonly associated with attention reorientation and cognitive control,” the study’s co-authors note (Belanger, 2018).

On the flip side, more compliant people just might not have the skill set to rebel, a study published in the British Journal of Social Psychology found. Their brains might not be as hardwired to express their desire to skip certain tasks through “silence or hesitation, groaning or sighing, laughing nervously, challenging the authority figure, refusing to carry on” or other means.

Whether or not the behavior of these people is caused by nature or nurture, it is but proper for them to consider personal reflections so that they know how to situate themselves in an organization or a group. If they persist, they will constantly encounter trouble and misunderstanding with the leader or the companions. There is no other person to take control over the behavior but the SELF.

Social psychologists have found that respect for authority is a universal instinctive trait in human psychology. As Haidt and Graham (2007) explain, "People often feel respect, awe, and admiration toward legitimate authorities, and many cultures have constructed virtues related to good leadership, which is often thought to involve magnanimity, fatherliness, and wisdom…[Societies may also] value virtues related to subordination: respect, duty, and obedience."

While respect for authority figures is a universal human trait, it is more salient for some. These individuals believe strong authority figures are necessary to maintain social order and prevent society from devolving into chaos.

Biblically, it is also mentioned in Romans 13: 1-3 - Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God.  So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished. For the authorities do not strike fear in people who are doing right, but in those who are doing wrong. Would you like to live without fear of the authorities? Do what is right, and they will honor you.

Whatever the situation might be, there is a fact that we are oftentimes blessed to have the positions that we have right now. Then, out from this reality, we can work on our own by displacing the best that we can give. Then, we will try to develop respect to the persons appointed or even anointed to manage us.

If we still could not accept these facts and continue to rebel, we might as well seek medical interventions. The battle-cry for mental health is loud during these trying times.