Parental Guidance

                                          

Malabad na mga bata gikan sa mga malabad na ginikanan. This is a fact since children are being raised by the parents based on their own values and orientation. Unruly and disrespectful youngsters came from parents who act that way.

According to Imperial Valley News, research has established that there are deep and significant effects of bad parenting. The effects of bad parenting on the children include antisocial behavior, poor resilience, depression, and aggression. Another study by the United Kingdom’s Department of Education indicates the effects of bad parenting on the children to include behavioral problems, poor coping skills, academic challenges, and mental health outcomes.

Kelvin Omere (2017) mentioned that frequent poor parenting decisions can have a harmful outcome through childhood and beyond.

For almost three decades of being a teacher and a principal, here are the types of parents whom I have met resulting to confusing, disruptive if not chaotic encounters in the academic world.

THE FAILED ACADEMICIAN. They were probably deprived of being an honor student before that they do the homework and assignments of the child. Then when the recognition activity comes and the kid won’t have a slot on the honor roll, they will proceed to the principal’s office and complain. They rant on the efficacy of the child’s “study habits” and will even lecture the teacher/principal about the grading system. These types fail to realize that IT IS THE CHILD WHO WILL PERFORM inside the classroom and NOT them.

THE TULFO PEOPLE. These are those parents who are making broadcast journalism as a threat to humanity rather than a platform of information and public service. There are FM stations who feign messianic solutions to societal problems. These parents threaten the teacher and the school to be shamed on the airwaves via programs whose anchors do not even have a degree on journalism or broadcasting. Some even proceed to these local stations. The moronic listeners then gloat on the “misfortune” of the educator.

THE DISBARRED LAWYERS. These parents come to school complaining on the contents of the Parental Consent and other forms. They will then point out unacceptable terminologies on the syntax of the document. Even if you will tell them that the paper is the official DepEd issuance, jargons must be discussed for an hour or two. They will then mention executive orders, republic acts and even barangay ordinances just to underscore their points. Two thousand five hundred students are waiting to be supervised yet one has to deal with the “lawyer”.

THE ABSENTEE PARENTS. To conceal their guilt from being NOT there during the growth of their children, there are those who will come to the office to complain on petty stuff. They just want to be recognized as the parents. But they are not there during the PTA meetings, recognition programs and other meaningful events. They are busy looking for a living they do not have time for their children.

THE COMPLAINANTS. When PTA meetings are called and agreements are made, there are those whose presence were NIL. They will then air out their complaints about things agreed by the majority. Isn’t this stupid?

THE EX-CONVICTS. These are the types whose children were being “bullied” by another student and claim to have killed someone and are willing to do it again by “eradicating” the bully. Of course, we understand the anger, but to resort to violence and claim to be having a criminal mind is…insane!

THE KONSENTIDORS. Who could miss this types? I threatened one mother to be reported to the social worker when she told me that she allows the boyfriend of her daughter (who is a minor) to stay in the room in their house. She told me with an “intelligent” expression that it is better for them to copulate inside the room than anywhere else. When she continued to insist on the correctness” of her actions, I told her to go out of the office I might break something. (She was called to the office since her daughter and the boyfriend had a violent quarrel in the school disturbing the classes. They were mimicking scenes from “Kadenang Ginto” daw.)

Being a good parent means you need to teach your child the moral in what is right and what is wrong. Setting limits and being consistent are the keys to good discipline. Be kind and firm when enforcing those rules. Focus on the reason behind the child’s behavior (parentingforthebrain.com, 2019).

We do not discount the presence of good parents in the school ecology. They are actually the best stakeholders to make the school a better place to learn.

But for those who are acting otherwise, remember this: The school’s focus is more on the academic knowledge and acquisition of skills. The way the child behaves is the main concern of the parents. 

Stop blaming the teachers of your inadequacies!