When Darkness Come

 

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Arang kadugyom pirme an kalibutan.

Affirmation plays a crucial role in childhood development. Young children need to feel valued and appreciated to cultivate a future where their confidence remains intact. Without consistent affirmation, developmental gaps in self-esteem may persist and even intensify as they age.

While some argue that adulthood offers the ability to overcome childhood insecurities, evidence and research suggest otherwise. These unresolved deficits often continue to affect individuals well into adulthood, persisting through old age.

When the desire for affirmation and other unmet needs overwhelm an individual, The Shadow begins to consume their persona, distorting how they present themselves to the world.

Carl Jung's concept of The Shadow(1921)  refers to the unconscious and often repressed aspects of an individual's personality—traits, desires, or behaviors that the person refuses to acknowledge because they are considered undesirable, socially unacceptable, or contrary to one’s self-image.

These aspects remain hidden in the unconscious but can strongly influence thoughts, emotions, and behavior, often manifesting in ways the person may not recognize or control.

This writer is deeply fascinated by Carl Jung’s concept of The Shadow, believing it holds profound significance in shaping an individual's psyche. It is as though this hidden aspect of the self, if left unchecked and nurtured, has the potential to haunt or even overpower the individual, exerting a powerful influence over their thoughts and actions.

While The Shadow cannot be entirely eliminated, it can be integrated and managed through conscious awareness and self-reflection. This process is central to Jung’s concept of individuation, where a person strives to become a more whole and balanced version of themselves by confronting and accepting their Shadow.

Jung emphasized that the goal is not to control or suppress the Shadow, but to integrate it. Suppressing the Shadow can lead to it manifesting in unintended ways, such as through projection or irrational behavior. By acknowledging the darker, hidden parts of oneself, individuals can gain insight into their unconscious motivations and desires, ultimately reducing the Shadow’s unconscious influence.

The Shadow cannot be "controlled" in the traditional sense, but it can be integrated through self-awareness, acceptance, and introspection. By doing so, individuals can harness its potential and prevent it from unconsciously sabotaging their life.

If not, darkness consumes their world.

Avoiding the Straitjacket

 

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Delikado.

Loneliness is dangerous. There are those who are trying to project an image of NOT being lonely yet their actions obviously manifest some sort of disorder.

Many individuals attempt to mask their isolation by projecting an image of confidence, busyness, or even happiness, but beneath the surface, their actions betray a deeper turmoil. These attempts to conceal loneliness often manifest in subtle yet telling ways—whether through erratic behavior, compulsive tendencies, or an overcompensation for emotional disconnection.

The UCLA Loneliness Scale, developed by Russell, Peplau, and Ferguson (1978), is often used to assess the subjective experience of loneliness. It reveals that loneliness, even when individuals have social contact, can lead to feelings of emptiness and disconnection, which are strong predictors of poor mental health outcomes such as anxiety and suicidal ideation.

Some individuals already exhibit these symptoms, displaying sudden erratic behavior, becoming combative without warning, and lashing out at others simply to gain attention.

Studies have shown that erratic behavior and aggression are commonly associated with conditions like borderline personality disorder (BPD), bipolar disorder, or attention-seeking behaviors in personality disorders (Krause-Utz et al., 2018; O’Connell & Myers, 2016).

These conditions often result in impulsivity and mood instability, which can aggravate interpersonal conflicts and worsen an individual's mental health over time.

Health has often been emphasized as a personal responsibility, requiring individuals to engage in regular self-assessment and reflection to gain deeper self-awareness. However, when self-awareness falls short or blind spots emerge, external feedback becomes crucial in identifying areas for improvement and guiding appropriate interventions.

If unattended and denial persists, the cuckoo’s nests await.

Enslaved

 

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Uman pirme man nija tag-isip an ija mga tagbati?

When an individual lacks the ability to manage emotions, they may either become highly reactive when feelings are triggered or fail to grasp the importance of engaging the Thinking Brain in decision-making.

Being emotionally dependent isn't inherently negative, but it can become limiting if it leads to impulsive decisions or a lack of objectivity in critical situations.

Those who haven’t developed strong emotional regulation skills may find it challenging to balance emotions with rational thought. Without the ability to manage or compartmentalize feelings, emotions take control.

The distinction between the Thinking Brain and the Feeling Brain highlights two essential aspects of human cognition: rationality and emotion. The Thinking Brain, often associated with the prefrontal cortex, is responsible for logical reasoning, problem-solving, and long-term planning. It processes information analytically, enabling individuals to make decisions based on facts and evidence rather than immediate emotional responses (Damasio, 1994).

On the other hand, the Feeling Brain, linked to the limbic system, especially the amygdala, governs emotional responses and instincts. It often reacts quickly, driven by desires and fears, without considering long-term consequences (LeDoux, 2000).

While both systems have their unique roles, a balance between the two is crucial for sound decision-making, as over-reliance on either can lead to undesirable outcomes. Excessive rationality might result in emotional detachment, while emotional dominance can lead to impulsive actions (Kahneman, 2011).

Both parts of the brain play essential roles, but many of our life's struggles arise from the Feeling Brain's dominance. We are inherently emotional creatures, and the Feeling Brain is the driver behind most of our decisions, while the Thinking Brain often tries to rationalize or justify those emotions afterward.

While we can't eliminate the influence of the Feeling Brain, we can learn to guide it by developing greater self-awareness and setting values that align with our goals.

People need to acknowledge the power of emotions but not be enslaved by them.

There will always be conflicts among our daily interactions when everything is governed by what we feel. Most of the time, we have to be objective in dealing with the things we are facing.

Otherwise, we will find ourselves perpetually burdened with feelings of discouragement and exhaustion.