Ikaw na may hinoon pakasad-on! There are those people who do not understand that they are their own enemy. Since they are selfish and the world seems to revolve around them, they will look for someone to blame about their inadequacies. Even if you are doing the right thing, they still find time looking for petty mistakes just to keep their pathetic lives intact.
People’s perception of their competence often diverges from their true level of competence. We argue that people have such erroneous view of their competence because self-evaluation is an intrinsically difficult task. People live in an information environment that does not contain all the data they need for accurate self-evaluation.
From the perspective of self-perception theory (Bem, 1967, 1972), we get to know ourselves in much the same way we get to know others. Just as we might observe someone’s action to make inferences about their desires, we may try to understand our attitudes by observing our own behavior. In Jamesian terms, self-perception theory posits that the perceiver self learns about internal attributes by observing external aspects of the perceived self.
Research supports the hypothesis that self-knowledge can be derived from behavior (Festinger, 1957; Festinger & Carlsmith, 1959; Nisbett & Wilson, 1977), but people perceive their internal thoughts and feelings to be more diagnostic of themselves than long-term observation of their overt behavior (Andersen & Ross, 1984).
Poor self-evaluation mixed with pride can be fatal. This often causes friction among family members and the people around the person. A vicious cycle of mood swings, conflict with others and the feeling of emptiness will overwhelm the person that the constant longing to feed the self is felt.
These people can be dangerous since they will make moves to destroy those who threaten their SELF. They spread vile rumors and perform character assassinations to those they consider as “the enemy”. Even if their “enemy” has good intentions, they need to destroy that “roadblock” to allow the selfish motives to continue.
Self-perception theory explains one way we can evaluate the self in the absence of other people. Yet most of our lives are spent in social settings; so it is reasonable to wonder whether other people play a role in how we come to know ourselves. That is why feedback is now accepted as a tool to look deeper into the self.
The problem is this: most of these types do not listen to others. They continue to do what they please and consider themselves as correct all the time.
Self-esteem is used to refer to the way people evaluate their various abilities and attributes. For example, a person who doubts his ability in school may be said to have low academic self-esteem and a person who thinks she is good at sports may be said to have high athletic self-esteem. Selfishness can oftentimes be a by-product of low self-esteem.
The terms self-confidence and self-efficacy have also been used to refer to these beliefs, and many people equate self-confidence with self-esteem. We prefer to call these beliefs self-evaluations or self-appraisals, as they refer to the way people evaluate or appraise their physical attributes, abilities, and personality characteristics (Brown, et.al, 2006).
Instead of being selfish, why not work on becoming self-confident by looking into our own strengths and weaknesses and make it as our lifestyle rather than blaming others who are just trying to make themselves better?
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