Imposing, Controlling

 

                                               (image:youtube.com)

Pagtoo nila bright sila ambaja kay tala-tala. Imposing people aren’t born, they’re made. There’s no gene or biological, physiological indicator that leads someone to become bossy. This tendency or this need to control other people is clearly transmitted through culture. First it comes from their general surroundings, and then from the family.

Have you noticed that there are people around you who seem imposing? The word
“please” is not in their vocabulary. Also, they seem to forget that no one has the monopoly of knowledge and ideas.

What makes these people become imposing is, on the one hand, a value system, and on the other, a combination of features of their personality. The bossy person doesn’t think they have a problem. Actually they usually think their actions are praiseworthy. Even their psychological conflicts reaffirm their opinion (exploringyourmind.com).

When others feign superiority, it is an obstacle for creativity, prevents moving forward and change, and encourages unhealthy patterns of communication. It also makes human relationships into a constant source of conflict that sometimes explode and sometimes sticks around as uninteresting and unproductive.

A lot of chances for development will be curtailed when the imposing person criticize others and insist on the “brilliance” of his/her idea. Contempt is always developed around these personalities.

What causes controlling behavior?

The most common are anxiety disorders and personality disorders. People with anxiety disorders feel a need to control everything around them in order to feel at peace. They may not trust anyone else to handle things the way they will.

Nazario (2022) mentions that controlling behaviors can also be a symptom of several personality disorders, such as histrionic personality, borderline personality, and narcissistic personality.

But since we know that there is something wrong with them, can we just let this pass? When we are constantly bombarded with the imposing situations we can always tell them to slow down. If they persist and continually insult us, in a curt voice, we can say:

See a doctor! Specifically, a psychiatrist. You are sick!