This Hunger Inside You

 

                                               (image: youtube.com)

Panan-aw nan iban hakad, garaon para mapansin nan mga halangdon, pero…

We often encounter individuals who consistently strive to be at the forefront, sometimes resorting to manipulative tactics to achieve their objectives. These people might engineer situations to ensure they remain in prominent positions, driven by a need for recognition and control.

Validation is a fundamental aspect of human psychology. This need influences behavior, shapes self-perception, and affects interpersonal relationships.

Abraham Maslow's hierarchy of needs places the need for esteem and belongingness as essential for psychological well-being. Validation and approval from others fulfill these esteem needs, contributing to a sense of achievement and recognition (Maslow, 1943).

What drives some individuals to seek recognition so intensely that it becomes obvious but appears natural to them?

Research based on John Bowlby’s attachment theory suggests that early attachment experiences with caregivers shape the need for approval and validation in adulthood. Insecure attachment may result in heightened dependency on external approval to feel valued (Ainsworth et al., 1978).

This is where the danger lies: when a person does not realize that intrinsic validation is more valuable than extrinsic validation, they may continually take on roles and responsibilities beyond their capacity. This relentless pursuit of external approval can lead to burnout and undermine their well-being.

Leon Festinger’s Social Comparison Theory (1954) suggests that individuals evaluate their own worth and abilities by comparing themselves to others. Accepting roles and responsibilities can be a way to elevate one’s status in comparison to peers. This comparison can provide a sense of achievement and validation, reinforcing self-worth.

But, relying heavily on external validation can make individuals vulnerable to fluctuations in others' opinions and approval. This dependency can undermine intrinsic motivation and self-worth.

Focusing on extrinsic validation makes individuals dependent on external factors beyond their control. This can lead to a fragile sense of self-worth that fluctuates with others' opinions and feedback.

Developing self-awareness helps individuals recognize when they are overly reliant on extrinsic validation and shift their focus towards internal sources of affirmation.

Intrinsic validation is vital for fostering genuine self-esteem, resilience, and long-term well-being. The opposite drives the cuckoos in you.