Unapologetic

 

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You are quick to question my actions, yet conveniently blind to your own. When exactly did professionalism, class, and the ability to act with finesse become something to mock? And since when did being loud, crude, and uncultured become preferable to carrying yourself with dignity?

Yes, these are different times. Never has it been easier for everyone to voice an opinion online. But does having the freedom to speak automatically make you right?

And does expressing sober thoughts, measured opinions, and morally attuned convictions suddenly make them wrong simply because they do not conform to your perspective? What, then, is your template for determining what is right and wrong? Your childhood? Your personal experiences? Your own understanding of the world?

We live in a time when opinions are often posted hastily, and information is consumed without the patience to examine its substance, context, or even the construction of a sentence. The more controversial the content, the more likely it is to become the talk of the town, while scholarly, thoughtful, and intellectually grounded perspectives are easily drowned out.

There seems to be a growing appetite for online entertainment, where outrage, novelty, and controversy often receive more attention than substance. Somewhere along the way, the purpose of learning appears to have been pushed to the sidelines. We scroll for amusement, react for validation, and share for attention, while the discipline of reading, thinking, questioning, and learning slowly becomes an afterthought. In an increasingly commercialized digital environment, human attention and behavior have become valuable commodities, shaping what people see, consume, and engage with (Zuboff, 2019).

Yet, there are still people who lust for the written word, who find nourishment in language and in the beautiful arrangement of words that somehow feeds the soul. There are still those who hunger for journalism where truth remains at its core. There are bookworms who linger in bookstores, reading blurbs, turning pages, and willingly wasting time simply to think.

And please, do not make fun of us. We may not be the majority, but we are still here. We still read. We still think. We still believe that words matter. And perhaps, in a world that is increasingly rushing to speak, that is reason enough for us to remain.

Yes, we may be boring to you, but do not mistake our quietness for being wrong.

When Primary Becomes Secondary

 

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You convince yourself that you are doing your job well. In fact, you have become even better at doing other things. But do you remember the days when you longed for this position? You worked tirelessly, made sacrifices, and did whatever it took to reach where you are now.

Yet somewhere along the way, you became lukewarm toward the very responsibilities you once aspired to embrace. The work that once gave you purpose slowly became secondary, replaced by pursuits that drew your attention away from your calling.

Have you ever paused to visit your inner self? Have you asked what emptiness you are trying to fill, or what validation you are seeking, when the very work entrusted to you is being left behind?

These are valid questions because we often witness people who gradually allow their real work to become secondary, until even the ordinary responsibilities of their position begin to feel burdensome. Some squander precious resources, especially time, while convincing themselves that they are doing well.

Others drift away from the work entrusted to them in pursuit of fulfillment that their responsibilities alone seem unable to provide. Many recognize these patterns within themselves yet choose to rationalize or dismiss them because confronting one's inner deficiencies demands honesty and courage.

As people lose sight of the purpose of their work, they often seek fulfillment in pursuits that offer temporary satisfaction but gradually distance them from their true responsibilities. Meaningful work requires more than competence. It requires a clear sense of purpose and fidelity to one's calling.

When that sense of purpose weakens, even ordinary duties can begin to feel like burdens. Rediscovering one's calling, therefore, begins with an honest examination of one's motivations and the reasons behind one's actions (Frankl, 2006).

What is even more troubling is that some begin to resent those who remain faithful to their responsibilities. Instead of allowing themselves to be challenged by such examples, they dismiss them as attention seekers, people pleasers, or individuals with a superiority complex.

Such labels can become convenient shields against uncomfortable self-reflection. It is often easier to question another person's motives than to confront the possibility that one's own commitment has faded. In doing so, they distance themselves from the difficult truth that they may no longer be giving their work the dedication it deserves.

So, stop painting me as the enemy. Perhaps I am not the foe you imagined. Perhaps the real adversary is not the person who remains faithful to the work, but the part of us that refuses to confront the truth.

Before judging those who simply strive to fulfill their calling, ask yourself whether the discomfort they awaken comes from their actions, or from the distance between who you once wanted to be and who you have become.

The Making of a Sick Mind

 

  

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These bomb threats in schools are becoming increasingly alarming. What some students, or even outsiders, dismiss as a prank is, in reality, a serious act that spreads fear, disrupts learning, and undermines the safety every school deserves. More than a disciplinary issue, it reflects a deeper problem that cannot be ignored.

Some young people who lack healthy affirmation and struggle with low self-worth may seek attention through harmful acts. They may mistake fear for influence and notoriety for significance. While this does not explain every case, it reminds us that destructive behavior often has roots that extend beyond the classroom.

Children reflect the adults who raise them and the society that shapes them. When responsible parenting weakens, schools inevitably confront the consequences. In an age where online validation often competes with meaningful relationships, children need more than provision. They need guidance, presence, and consistent examples. After all, they learn more from what adults do than from what adults say.

Teachers, meanwhile, are increasingly challenged in maintaining discipline. Some students invoke their rights without recognizing that rights are inseparable from responsibilities, leaving educators hesitant to enforce appropriate corrective measures. At the same time, social media has made it easier for harmful behaviors, including bomb threats and bullying tactics seen elsewhere, to be imitated locally.

Respect for authority must be restored through leadership that is firm, fair, and lawful. As a school principal, I learned that discipline is not about intimidation but about accountability. By consistently enforcing rules, involving parents, and working within the law, I found that students were less likely to challenge legitimate authority because they understood that expectations were clear and consistently upheld.

Research supports this approach. Schools that practice authoritative discipline, enforcing rules firmly, fairly, and consistently, report lower levels of bullying and victimization (Gregory et al., 2010). Students are more likely to respect authority when discipline is just, predictable, and guided by due process.

Every bomb threat begins long before the message is sent. It begins where responsibility is neglected, values are left untaught, and authority is allowed to weaken. Safer schools will not be built by security measures alone, but by homes that nurture, schools that discipline justice, and communities that choose to build character stronger than fear. 

Mirror First

 

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Don't you realize you're already old enough to stop acting like a child? Emotional growth should accompany physical growth. If you are already in your forties or fifties yet still cannot regulate your emotions and continue to react like an immature child, perhaps it is time to ask yourself an uncomfortable question: Have you neglected your own personal growth?

Growing older is inevitable; growing up is a choice.

You may refuse to control your emotional outbursts. You may never take the time to confront your insecurities, shortcomings, and unresolved issues. Instead, you may find it easier to blame others for your behavior. Whether you fail to recognize your own immaturity, deliberately ignore it, or have simply allowed unhealthy emotional habits to become deeply ingrained, the outcome is the same: you deny yourself the opportunity for genuine growth.

Individuals who habitually blame others for their reactions often demonstrate poor emotional regulation and limited self-awareness, two fundamental components of emotional intelligence. Genuine maturity begins when you stop justifying your behavior through external circumstances and honestly examine your own thoughts, emotions, and actions (Mayer & Salovey, 1995).

The more troubling reality is that people who refuse to examine themselves can be found everywhere. They occupy positions in government, lead organizations, manage workplaces, and are even part of our own circles of friends and families. Instead of fostering growth, encouraging dialogue, and inspiring wisdom, they often suppress opportunities for learning and personal development. Their inability to manage themselves creates environments where fear replaces trust, conflict overshadows collaboration, and growth struggles to take root.

A vicious cycle of negativity soon follows wherever such individuals hold influence. Over time, these unhealthy behaviors become normalized as others tolerate, excuse, or even imitate them simply to avoid conflict. What begins as one person's emotional immaturity gradually erodes sound judgment, weakens values, and stifles both personal and collective growth. When destructive conduct goes unchallenged, it eventually ceases to be the exception and becomes the culture.

So, you choose to focus on my mistakes and celebrate my small setbacks? Why not examine your own missteps and learn from them instead? The energy you spend criticizing others could become the very force that transforms your own character. In doing so, you can contribute something meaningful to the world, making your life a source of growth and purpose rather than one consumed by resentment and contempt.

In the end, your greatest enemy is not the person you criticize but the person you refuse to become. The world has never needed more critics; it has always needed more people willing to master themselves.

Spotlight Effect and Social Comparison

 

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You think you are better than everyone else. They think the very same about themselves. In their eyes, they are better than you. Pride, after all, is rarely a one-sided illusion.

Ironically, the same mind that convinces us of our own importance can also convince us that everyone is watching us. Whether through pride or insecurity, we often place ourselves at the center of other people's attention.

I once had a godchild ask me if he looked presentable. I smiled and told him that he did. Then I shared something I have long believed: do not worry too much about how others see you. Most people are too occupied with their own appearance, worries, and insecurities to scrutinize yours. Just as you wonder how you look, they are wondering the very same thing about themselves.

Psychologists call this the spotlight effect. It is our tendency to overestimate the extent to which other people notice and evaluate our appearance, behavior, or mistakes. Because our own experiences dominate our awareness, we naturally assume they occupy the attention of others as well. In reality, most people are equally absorbed in their own concerns, making the spotlight we imagine far less intense than we believe (Gilovich et al., 2000).

For some, this illusion becomes a prison. They gradually retreat into their shells, developing a self-limiting disposition driven by the fear of being judged. The imagined scrutiny of others discourages them from speaking freely, taking risks, and embracing opportunities that could help them grow.

This should not be confused with social comparison. While the spotlight effect concerns how much attention we think others give us, social comparison involves evaluating our worth, abilities, or appearance against those of other people. Although distinct, both distort how we see ourselves.

Left unchecked, these tendencies can hinder personal growth and impede the development of individuality. When people become preoccupied with imagined judgment or relentless comparison, they suppress their authentic selves, avoid meaningful opportunities, and limit their potential. In doing so, they diminish not only their own fulfillment but also the unique contributions they can offer to society and the greater good.

So, do you believe that everyone is watching your every move? Do you feel compelled to keep pace with everyone else's achievements, appearance, or success? If so, you may be falling into the traps of the spotlight effect and social comparison. The greatest freedom begins when you realize that most people are not judging your life; they are simply trying to make sense of their own.

The spotlight you fear exists mostly in your mind. The light that truly matters is the one you bring to the world.

Road To Devolution

 

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Some children now call their parents by their first names, while others interact with their teachers in ways that would have been considered unusually informal only a generation ago. Such behaviors reflect changing social norms shaped by online culture, evolving parenting philosophies, and broader cultural influences. Many parents welcome these changes, believing they foster warmer and more approachable relationships between adults and children.

For some, this shift may seem progressive and even necessary. Yet when cultural change outpaces the reinforcement of values and boundaries, it can unintentionally redirect behavior in counterproductive ways. Not every family, school, or community is equally prepared to navigate these evolving norms, and without thoughtful guidance, respect, discipline, and personal accountability may gradually lose their place within the social fabric.

We must also recognize that people adapt to change differently. For some, emerging values are difficult to reconcile with long held beliefs, creating confusion and emotional strain. Within many families, the convergence of traditional expectations and contemporary ideals can make it difficult to establish a coherent value system, leaving young people uncertain about the principles by which they should live.

These shifts are also evident in everyday life. Parents increasingly question how teachers teach and, at times, expect schools to assume responsibilities that have traditionally belonged to the home. Families likewise feel compelled to emulate lifestyles they encounter online, celebrating birthdays, monthsaries, and countless occasions simply to avoid being left behind. While these practices are not inherently problematic, they reflect changing priorities that differ from the Filipino tradition of simplicity, prudence, and the shared responsibility of families and schools in raising children.

Viewed in isolation, these changes may appear insignificant. Taken together, however, they invite us to reflect on how young people now negotiate authority, identity, and belonging. Recent tragedies, including the school shooting that shocked the country, remind us that no single event arises from one cause alone. Yet they also compel us to ask whether the relationships that once grounded children in guidance, accountability, and shared values are becoming increasingly fragile amid the competing influences of modern life.

The same reflection applies to our conversations about mental health. Depression and anxiety are genuine conditions that deserve compassion, understanding, and professional care. At the same time, there are instances in which mental health language is casually invoked or misused to evade responsibility or pressure adults into conceding to one's demands. Such cases should never diminish the experiences of those who truly struggle, but they remind us that discernment is as necessary as empathy.

Change is inevitable, and every generation will redefine its relationship with family, authority, and society. Yet progress should not require the abandonment of the values that have long sustained healthy communities. Warmth need not replace respect, freedom need not diminish responsibility, and modernity need not abandon wisdom. The challenge is not to resist change, but to ensure that, as culture evolves, our character evolves with it.

Alienation

 

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There was a time when a teacher volunteered to operate the sound system during a learners' recital, but I declined the offer. It was not because I questioned the teacher's capability, but because I did not want to place him in a position where a technical failure could unfairly become his burden. Instead, we hired professional technicians because ensuring a smooth program was their responsibility. If they failed to deliver, I could demand accountability without reservation because it was the work they were engaged to perform. Accountability should rest with those entrusted, equipped, and expected to carry it.

That experience reminded me that our instinct to locate responsibility extends far beyond school programs. Lately, we have witnessed an outpouring of commentaries and formal investigations surrounding the death of a beloved basketball player and the recent school shooting in Tacloban. In moments of tragedy, we seldom find rest until someone can be held accountable. Perhaps it is our way of making sense of the senseless, believing that once responsibility is identified, grief becomes more bearable and chaos appears, however briefly, to be under control.

This tendency is hardly new. Social psychologist Gilad Hirschberger (2006) argues that people seek explanations after tragedy because doing so restores a sense of order and predictability in a world suddenly made uncertain. Accountability, therefore, is not merely a legal or social expectation. It is also a psychological need.

Yet there is a deeper form of alienation when our search ends with blaming others and never reaches the difficult terrain within ourselves. What if, instead, we asked questions that have no easy answers? What is this tragedy asking me to learn? If I were the coach, would my good intentions alone absolve me of the unintended consequences of my decisions? If I were the parents of the shooter, have I become so consumed by the countless demands of modern life that I failed to notice the quiet unraveling of my own child? These questions are not meant to indict anyone. Rather, they remind us that every public tragedy carries a private invitation to examine the parts of ourselves we too often leave unquestioned.

In an era that seems to require scapegoats to make sense of tragedy, we often forget to place ourselves within the narrative, not as spectators searching for someone to blame, but as individuals capable of becoming part of the solution. We become so preoccupied with identifying who failed that we overlook the more unsettling question of how our own choices, omissions, and responsibilities can help prevent the same tragedies from happening again.

Perhaps the greatest measure of our humanity is not how quickly we identify who is at fault, but how honestly we allow tragedy to transform us. Accountability will always have its rightful place because justice demands it. Yet beyond the verdicts, the investigations, and the public outrage lies a quieter responsibility that belongs to each of us. Every loss asks whether we have become more attentive, more compassionate, and more faithful to the roles entrusted to us.

Society is not made safer simply because the guilty are punished. It becomes safer when ordinary people choose, in the silence of their everyday lives, to become better parents, teachers, leaders, neighbors, and citizens. Perhaps accountability has never been only about finding the right person to blame. Perhaps it has always been about becoming the right person to carry our own responsibilities.

Wounds

 

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There is a film titled “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” that captured the attention of many, including Academy Awards jurors. It tells the unusual story of a man who ages in reverse, beginning life as an old man and gradually growing younger. In its final scenes, Benjamin ultimately returns to infancy, ending his journey as a baby.

Some viewers interpret the film by drawing parallels to real life, suggesting that there are people who, instead of growing into maturity, seem to regress into immaturity. It is as though the film reflects how some individuals, regardless of age, remain governed by emotional deficits, eventually slipping into the irrationality and impulsiveness often associated with infancy.

In contemporary terms, Goleman (1995) posits that emotional intelligence, particularly self-regulation, is central to mature behavior, and its absence may lead individuals to act impulsively despite chronological age. This perspective supports the idea that emotional adulthood is not guaranteed by time but earned through inner regulation and unresolved conflict resolved.

We often encounter individuals who appear as giants on the outside, yet carry children trapped within them. More troubling is when these individuals are placed in positions of leadership, where unhealed inner wounds quietly seep into decisions, relationships, and systems. In such roles, harm is not always born of malice, but of overflow—the unconscious need to make others feel the weight they themselves cannot contain alone.

And this is when life becomes complicated and quietly fractured. Instead of moving toward the greater good, organizations begin to weaken as people are slowly consumed by what they carry within. Each one nursing private wounds, they unravel in silence, and in doing so, lose sight of the mission they once swore to serve.

Self-awareness has long been encouraged as a foundation for personal and relational growth. The “child within” must be acknowledged, not to be indulged, but to be understood and healed, so that wholeness may take its place. This process is not an end in itself but a passage toward becoming more capable contributors to the communities we belong to. When development turns inward without a parallel commitment to growth outward, education, skills, and even life itself risk collapsing into self-reference. True growth, therefore, lies in the balance between healing what is broken and building what is possible.

We are not defined by the depth of our wounds, but by the quiet courage to rise from them, and still choose to serve something greater than ourselves.

Switched Off

 

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Why was there such a massive reaction to the death of Rene Clert Baterbonia?

Beyond the sorrow that follows any loss, many were struck by the cruel timing of Rene Clert Baterbonia’s passing. Fresh from a triumph in the recently concluded Palarong Pambansa, he carried the quiet certainty of a future just beginning to open. He had spoken of Manila, of Ateneo, of basketball as a pathway toward something larger than himself. Then, almost abruptly, that trajectory collapsed. In what was meant to be a team-building activity, he drowned, and with him sank the unfolding possibilities of a life only starting to take shape. The grief, for many, was not only for what was lost, but for what had already begun to be imagined.

Anger soon followed, as it often does in grief. For those who knew him or followed his journey online, sorrow became a demand for accountability. Attention turned toward the figures entrusted with his care, particularly the team’s leadership, as people struggled to reconcile promise with preventable loss. In moments like these, grief rarely remains silent; it searches for a target, a name, a reason that might contain the chaos of absence.

Such reactions reflect a familiar human impulse to assign meaning when events resist understanding. As Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler observe, anger is a common response in bereavement, often arising from the mind’s attempt to restore order in the wake of rupture (Kübler-Ross & Kessler, 2005). It is less about punishment than about coherence, a way of making the unbearable momentarily explainable.

In a wider sense, this need for accountability is shaped by a public culture accustomed to scrutiny and exposure, where responsibility is constantly negotiated in the open. Against this backdrop, a young life lost so suddenly becomes more than a private tragedy; it becomes a public question. And when answers feel absent, silence itself begins to feel like another form of injury.

This is why vigilance matters. Trust in coaches and guardians of the young must never drift into passivity. Authority in these spaces is not only functional but moral, demanding attentiveness, care, and the discipline of foresight. When that duty is softened by neglect or convenience, the consequences are no longer abstract. They are irreversible, carried by those left behind.

In the end, the grief over Rene's death has extended beyond individual mourning into something collective and distinctly Filipino. It echoes in shared anxieties about youth, potential, and the fragility of safety in spaces meant for growth. In his absence, many see not only a life interrupted, but a reflection of their own quiet fears for those still beginning their journey. And in that recognition, grief becomes both remembrance and reckoning.

Let You Own Light Shine

 

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You feel threatened by my abilities and skills? Why? Is it because you measure your worth against that of others? Must every strength you see in someone else become a challenge to your own?

There are instances in workplaces and group settings where individuals perceive the competence and growth of others as a form of threat. Is this because one’s sense of worth becomes tied to comparison with others? Must the strengths of others always be interpreted as a challenge to one’s own?

When another person’s success, confidence, or abilities cause discomfort, it may be easier to label them as a threat than to reflect on the internal reasons behind such reactions. This tendency aligns with the concept of projection, where internal insecurities are attributed to others. Recognizing this allows for greater self-awareness, healthier relationships, and a more focused commitment to personal growth rather than constant comparison.

In many workplaces, individuals who are actively developing their skills and performing their responsibilities with diligence are sometimes misperceived as competitors. Many of them are not engaged in comparison at all. They are guided by personal growth, professional responsibility, and a healthy sense of self-worth. However, their progress may be interpreted differently by those who struggle with self-image concerns.

Such perceptions, when present among leaders or colleagues, can unintentionally affect organizational development. When insecurity influences judgment, competence and initiative may be misread as threats rather than contributions. This can lead to counterproductive responses that undermine collaboration and create unnecessary division within the organization.

As a result, workplace dynamics may be affected, as insecurity-based interpretations can weaken trust and reduce collaboration. As noted in recent organizational psychology discussions, such perceptions can distort interpersonal interactions and contribute to avoidable conflict instead of shared progress (Clair et al., 2022).

Ultimately, individuals who demonstrate emotional maturity and self-awareness tend to contribute more effectively within both leadership and group contexts. Their capacity for self-regulation and reflection enables them to engage constructively with others, fostering collaboration and strengthening organizational well-being. In this way, personal development becomes directly linked to collective progress.

So, please take a moment to reflect on whether I am simply doing my job with integrity and purpose, rather than challenging or questioning your credibility.

The Face In The Mirror

 

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You see me? I see you too. But while you spend your days examining my flaws, you remain a stranger to the person in your own mirror.

Daily, I take my journey one step at a time. Some days, I reach the goals I set for myself and find quiet satisfaction in small victories. On other days, I fall short, stumble, or discover that things do not unfold as planned. Still, I take note of both success and failure, knowing that each carries a lesson worth keeping.

What matters most is that I remain grounded in my own direction. My energy is not spent on controlling others or dwelling on circumstances beyond my reach, but on refining my own actions, decisions, and character. After all, the only space where I hold genuine influence is within myself. And so, each day, I continue forward, committed to becoming better than I was yesterday.

At times, we encounter public remarks that highlight the flaws of others, often delivered with confidence that can resemble moral certainty. Yet such criticism is not always rooted in understanding. In some cases, it reflects projection, where unresolved inner struggles shape how one perceives others.

What is often overlooked is that no one stands above imperfection. In focusing too intently on the shortcomings of others, it becomes easy to miss the opportunity for self-examination. The same lens used to judge outwardly can also be turned inward, where it may reveal more than expected.

Research in psychology suggests that criticism and self-evaluation are often intertwined with self-perception and internalized insecurities, influencing how individuals interpret both themselves and others (Gold & Smout, 2024; Malekzad et al., 2022). True growth, however, begins when attention shifts inward with honesty and humility, allowing self-awareness to take precedence over judgment.

Yet, as we choose to remain proactive in our own growth, we continue our journey undeterred. We move forward not because criticism does not affect us, but because we refuse to let it define our direction. While some remain preoccupied with judgment and dissatisfaction, we invest our energy in learning, discipline, and self-improvement.

Harmful words do not need to become permanent burdens. They can be acknowledged, then released, without allowing them to shape one’s identity. Often, what is spoken of others reveals more about the speaker than the subject. Our responsibility is not to respond to every criticism, but to remain committed to becoming better versions of ourselves each day.

In the end, I will see myself clearly, with both strengths acknowledged and flaws understood as part of growth. I will recognize who I have become because I chose reflection over reaction and understanding over judgment.

The question is not whether I can see myself. The question is: can you see yourself, too?

Papa Don't Preach

 

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“Do I come across as preachy? Does this sound like a sense of superiority?”

There are instances when social media timelines become saturated with posts that lean toward being preachy. Often, the people posting them may not even realize how they come across to others. In Psychology, this may be associated with what is called the “moral superiority bias,” the tendency of individuals to unconsciously present their views, choices, or lifestyles as more enlightened, ethical, or rational than those of others.

At times, what begins as self-expression or unsolicited advice can subtly transform into a performance of virtue, where the tone overshadows the message itself. Instead of encouraging reflection, such posts may unintentionally create distance, defensiveness, or quiet resentment among readers.

This becomes more evident in online spaces where people constantly announce how others should think, behave, heal, succeed, or live, often without realizing how these messages may sound to those quietly struggling with realities different from their own.

These are also matters worth reflecting on as writers, because the things we express, consciously or unconsciously, often reveal deeper dimensions of our inner world. Our words are shaped by experience, conviction, insecurity, desire, and even impulses we may not immediately recognize within ourselves.

In this sense, moments when our writing begins to sound excessively instructive or morally elevated may serve as opportunities for introspection. They invite us to examine whether, beneath the intention to share or inspire, there also exists a subtle tendency to position ourselves above others, a tendency that can unconsciously transform expression into preaching.

According to Brown (2012), individuals often perceive their own beliefs, actions, and values more favorably than those of others, which can unconsciously shape the way they communicate in public spaces, including social media. This may explain why certain expressions online can unintentionally appear preachy or condescending despite benign intentions.

This may or may not cause harm to others, yet it remains worthwhile for individuals to examine their intentions and reflect on their state of mind. Such reflection allows one to become more aware of the subtle ways thoughts and emotions manifest in expression. In doing so, unnecessary hurt and quiet alienation may be avoided, allowing social media spaces to become less arenas of tension and moral posturing, and more places of affirmation, understanding, and peace.

Perhaps the true measure of wisdom in the digital age is not how loudly we correct others, but how deeply we examine ourselves before speaking.

Those Who Lead

 

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“Weak leadership creates a vacuum that informal power fills.”

From the perspective of Niccolò Machiavelli, political and organizational power rarely remains idle. When formal leadership weakens, through indecision, loss of legitimacy, or inability to command trust, space is created for alternative centers of influence to emerge. These actors, though unofficial, begin to shape direction, decisions, and loyalty within a system.

This dynamic is observable across different settings. In schools, individuals are sometimes referred to as the “little principal,” while in local governance, similar figures are tagged as the “little mayor.” Such labels suggest the rise of informal influence operating alongside or beyond formal authority. In some cases, this may reflect gaps in leadership capacity, where official leaders are unable to fully consolidate direction or cohesion.

In political arenas, similar tensions become more visible. Recent events in the Senate involving accusations directed at the National Bureau of Investigation, alongside the presence of security forces such as the police and the Office of the Sergeant at Arms, have raised questions about how institutional authority is exercised and coordinated. Beyond the specifics, such incidents often prompt reflection on whether leadership structures are sufficiently clear and stable to prevent escalation or confusion in moments of pressure.

At the broader societal level, public sentiment reflects a familiar paradox. Many express fatigue over weak leadership yet continue to support the same political figures they later criticize. This has contributed to deep polarization, where political loyalty sometimes overrides critical evaluation. In highly divided environments, public discourse can shift away from accountability and toward defensive allegiance, limiting constructive engagement.

History shows that when institutional trust erodes, societies become vulnerable to stronger but not always healthier forms of authority, including authoritarian consolidation in extreme cases, as seen in figures such as Adolf Hitler. While contexts differ, the underlying pattern remains consistent, weakened systems often allow more dominant personalities to shape outcomes disproportionately.

In this light, the challenge is not only institutional but also civic. Leadership stability depends on both effective governance and a public that values discernment over blind loyalty. Without this balance, informal power continues to fill the spaces left by weakened authority, sometimes constructively, but often unpredictably.

Ultimately, when formal leadership loses clarity, influence does not disappear, it simply relocates. The critical question is whether that shift strengthens or distorts the system it inhabits.

No Meaning

 

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Waya nay lain mahimo kay maaya na!

One of the deepest confrontations a person must endure is boredom, not merely the absence of activity, but the absence of meaning. Psychologists often describe boredom as a condition that emerges when routines lose significance and existence begins to feel mechanical. In such moments, the human spirit longs for relevance, for proof that one’s presence matters in a vast and indifferent world. Thus, boredom does not simply invite distraction, it pushes people toward visibility, toward actions that might leave a mark and affirm their existence.

Boredom can reveal itself when a person suddenly becomes excessively noisy, impulsive, or irrational across various platforms. Rather than pursuing self-actualization, they may retreat into immediate forms of validation through petty quarrels on social media, unnecessary provocations, or flamboyant displays meant to attract attention. Beneath these actions often lies a deeper hunger, not merely for recognition, but for meaning and reassurance against obscurity.

Abraham Maslow argued that individuals who fail to progress toward self-actualization often remain preoccupied with external validation. Likewise, Carl Jung emphasized that self-awareness and individuation are essential to emotional maturity, as unresolved inner deficiencies frequently surface through projection, impulsivity, and performative behavior.

Some have wondered whether artists such as Sam Smith, who departed from a previously wholesome image through provocative performances and flamboyant aesthetics, can be seen as “losing themselves.” Yet psychological discourse offers a more nuanced reading. Rather than immediately labeling such transformations as disorder, scholars often examine how identity struggles, unmet emotional needs, or the pressure to remain relevant can push individuals toward increasingly sensational forms of self-expression. What appears excessive may also reflect an attempt to negotiate visibility and selfhood within a culture deeply invested in spectacle.

Indeed, it is the self that ultimately determines where it stands at any given moment. Yet while individuals may view their actions as expressions of freedom or authenticity, others can still perceive signs of imbalance, insecurity, or immaturity beneath them. In this sense, human behavior becomes not only a reflection of personal choice, but also a quiet revelation of one’s inner condition.

In the end, behavior often reveals what words attempt to conceal, the struggle of the self to find meaning, stability, and recognition in a world constantly demanding visibility.

Electrocuted

 

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Unhon daw pagpa-miyembro sa 4Ps.

There are circulating claims on social media suggesting that the recent increase in electricity bills is due to a government share allegedly allocated for beneficiaries of the Pantawid Pamilyang Pilipino Program (4Ps). Some posts have even taken a satirical turn, implying that middle-income households might now consider qualifying for the program themselves.

There is no evidence supporting this claim, as 4Ps is funded through the national budget and not through electricity billing. However, electricity bills do include a regulated lifeline rate subsidy system overseen by the Energy Regulatory Commission, where low-income households receive discounted rates that are partly supported through cross-subsidies within the power pricing structure. This is a social protection mechanism for basic electricity access, not a deduction for cash transfer programs.

Concerns have nevertheless emerged among taxpayers regarding rising deductions from income amid inflation and increasing costs of basic goods. This has fueled perceptions that government subsidies are expanding, sometimes framed in public discourse as “dole-out” programs. For many in the middle class, this adds to financial strain and raises questions about fairness in the distribution of fiscal burdens.

Such sentiments, while understandable given current economic pressures, can also risk reinforce negative perceptions toward beneficiaries of social assistance programs. At the same time, they highlight a governance challenge: the need to balance social protection with fiscal sustainability in a way that does not deepen social divides.

This concern is well documented in public policy literature. Stiglitz (2012) notes that when economic arrangements are perceived as uneven in distributing costs and benefits, trust in institutions can erode and social tension may increase.

Citizens are therefore called to uphold equity and consider the broader public good. In turn, public leaders must ensure that social programs are transparent, well-targeted, and aligned with taxpayers’ contributions, thereby maintaining both fairness and public trust.

Ultimately, good governance is not measured by how it separates burden and benefit, but by how it integrates them justly, so that no sector feels overlooked, and every contribution is recognized within a shared pursuit of fairness and social cohesion.

Rewired Minds

 

Paunahay pagsalida.

In our community, an elderly couple was brutally stabbed to death, sending waves of fear through the neighborhood. Not long after, another couple in a nearby town was shot and killed, deepening the unease and heightening collective anxiety. These incidents have left many asking difficult questions, as uncertainty continues to surround the circumstances behind such acts.

What is equally troubling is how these incidents are being relayed on social media. Some individuals immediately turn on live feeds and cry out for help in a state of panic, often incoherent and overwhelming, making it harder for responders and viewers alike to grasp the situation and act swiftly. Others go as far as broadcasting the victims’ bodies in real time, forgetting that these are not mere spectacles, but human lives lost, people with families who may find such exposure deeply offensive, distressing, and profoundly disrespectful.

Have people become so consumed by technology that every emotion must be broadcast across social media platforms, and every action filtered through them? In many instances, there appears to be an unspoken compulsion to document and share, as though an experience is not fully realized until it is made visible to others.

According to Sherry Turkle (2011), the constant urge to share reflects a shift in how individuals construct identity and connection, often prioritizing visibility over presence. Similarly, Jean M. Twenge (2017) argues that the rise of digital culture has intensified self-focus and validation-seeking behaviors, particularly through online platforms. Together, these perspectives suggest that technology does not merely facilitate communication but also reshapes how people experience and express their emotions, at times encouraging a reflex to make every moment public.

One may argue that the freedom to express oneself extends to any platform and in any form, yet such freedom should never come at the expense of universal values. Respect, discipline, and empathy must take precedence, guiding how and when we choose to share. The urgency to be the first to broadcast an event should not override the responsibility to uphold human dignity and sensitivity toward others.

From a Stoic perspective, as reflected in the teachings of Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius, emotions should never overpower sound judgment. Even in moments of fear or urgency, it is important to pause, think clearly, and act with restraint. In doing so, individuals not only maintain composure but also contribute to a more respectful and responsible way of responding to events that affect the community as a whole.

Driven or Indolent?

 

                                                (image: youtube.com)

Ampa molihok kun orada na!

Self-discipline, first defined in the 1690s as the ability to guide, retrain, and control oneself, has retained its core meaning despite societal changes over time. In contemporary terms, it refers to the capacity to regulate and correct one’s behavior for self-improvement (University of the People, 2022; Collins Dictionary, n.d.; Merriam-Webster Dictionary, n.d.), as well as to manage and motivate oneself to act appropriately without external direction or pressure (Collins Dictionary, n.d.; Longman, 2022).

This quality is evident in individuals who demonstrate sustained focus and intentional effort in their pursuits. Athletes, for instance, often devote significant time to training, willingly sacrificing social activities and popular trends to refine their performance. Likewise, writers may become deeply immersed in the process of shaping language and ideas, losing track of time as thoughts are gradually refined into meaningful expression. In both cases, action is guided by an internal commitment to improvement rather than external compulsion.

Self-disciplined individuals are characterized by intrinsic motivation and purposeful action. They consistently regulate their behavior in alignment with long-term goals, enabling persistence even in the absence of immediate rewards or external supervision.

In contrast, indolence reflects a tendency to avoid sustained effort, where action is often driven only by necessity or external pressure. Individuals who exhibit this disposition are more likely to delay tasks and allow circumstances to dictate their behavior rather than actively shaping their direction.

José Rizal’s essay “The Indolence of the Filipinos” offers a critical examination of indolence within a historical and colonial context. While it does not seek to generalize or attribute such a trait as inherent to Filipinos, it instead invites reflection on the broader social and structural conditions that shape human behavior and productivity.

These opposing orientations highlight differing levels of self-regulation. While self-disciplined individuals demonstrate consistency between intention and action, indolent behavior is marked by gaps in follow-through and engagement. Research indicates that higher self-discipline is associated with reduced procrastination and greater autonomous motivation, whereas weaker self-regulation contributes to habitual delay and passivity (Tao & Jing, 2023; Mezghiche et al., 2024).

Ultimately, the distinction between self-discipline and indolence becomes visible in behavior, decisions, and how others respond to them. Over time, these patterns shape trust, expectations, and credibility in both personal and professional contexts.

Let's Pickle!

 

                                             (image: youtube.com)

Pito ako ka kilometro, ikaw?

Lately, it is hard not to notice the growing enthusiasm for pickleball, with courts filling up, paddles in motion, and laughter echoing with every rally. At the same time, more people are walking or jogging in the quiet rhythm of early mornings and the fading light of late afternoons. This invites a curious question: are these simply passing trends, or do they reflect a deeper collective shift toward reclaiming health, time, and well-being?

A phenomenon often referred to as FOMO, or fear of missing out, may help explain this. In an age of constant digital connectivity, behaviors spread quickly as people observe what others are doing online. What begins as simple awareness can gradually turn into participation, as individuals feel a subtle pull to join in what appears to be socially rewarding or widely accepted.

This aligns with The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell, where small actions are shown to reach a critical threshold and become widespread. Through ideas such as the “law of the few,” the “stickiness factor,” and the “power of context,” Gladwell explains how trends spread not only through individual choice but also through social influence and environmental cues. In this sense, what appears to be a personal decision is often shaped by a broader pattern of social contagion.

It is important, however, to recognize that these activities are inherently beneficial. They support physical health through regular movement and enhance mental well-being through connection and shared experience. Exercise in this context becomes more than a solitary pursuit; it is enriched by companionship, where collaboration and community naturally emerge.

One individual shared that he runs for Strava, a fitness app that records running activities through GPS-enabled devices. It tracks distance, pace, time, and heart rate, turning each workout into a structured record of performance. For him, the experience goes beyond running itself. The digital traces of his effort provide a sense of fulfillment, as each entry becomes a visible marker of discipline and progress. With its social features that allow users to share activities and receive encouragement, the app also transforms exercise into a shared experience, deepening motivation and satisfaction.

A youngster once told me that while his true passion is tennis, he often finds himself playing pickleball, not out of preference but out of a desire to belong. Surrounded by friends who have embraced the game, he feels compelled to join in, choosing connection over personal inclination so as not to feel left out.

With these in mind, individuals are encouraged to reflect on the intentions behind their participation in emerging trends. When choices are driven primarily by the need to belong or by social comparison, there is a risk of emotional fatigue, dissatisfaction, and anxiety when expectations are not met. In contrast, self-awareness allows for more meaningful engagement, guided by personal values rather than external pressure (Alutaybi et al., 2020).

In the end, the rise of trends like pickleball and fitness tracking is not merely about recreation or technology, but about the deeper human desire to belong and be seen. Yet in the space between participation and pressure lies a choice. One can be carried by the momentum of collective influence or stand with a clearer sense of self, grounded in intention rather than imitation. Trends will always come and go, but self-awareness allows individuals to engage without losing direction and to connect without losing identity.

People First

 

                                               (image: youtube.com)

Di dapat magliaw liaw.

Scientific management calls for proactive action in the face of challenges. A manager must anticipate possibilities, explore options, and implement measures that mitigate risks while keeping the greater good of the people in focus. This is not merely a concept, but a disciplined mindset grounded in sound judgment and practical wisdom. Accountability ultimately rests with the leader, whose responsibility is to guide the group or institution toward meaningful and improved outcomes.

The oil crisis, intensified by conflict in the Middle East, underscores the urgent need for swift and decisive responses to protect those most affected. Jeepney, tricycle, and bus drivers voice daily struggles to survive, while social media shares stories of riders who pawn basic belongings just to reach home. These are stark reminders of the human cost when plans are delayed and concern remains superficial.

Recent research shows that effective crisis leadership requires leaders who not only respond quickly but also foster organizational resilience by motivating others and aligning them toward shared goals (Chiwisa, 2024). Transformational leadership, in particular, has been shown to build resilience by encouraging innovation, shared vision, and psychological capital among followers during crises (Njaramba & Olukuru, 2025). In turn, these leadership behaviors strengthen an organization’s ability to withstand and adapt to disruption (Sun et al., 2021).

The president and other political leaders must act in unison, focusing on the common good. They must set aside personal and political interests and address pressing issues with clarity and purpose. In doing so, they return to the reason they sought public office—not for power or position, but to serve the people with integrity, responsibility, and genuine commitment.

Ultimately, leadership reveals its true measure in the courage to place the welfare of the people above all else.