Bagan masawaing na! This was the comment given by someone
who confronted high school lovers who performed PDA (Public Display of
Affection) to the dismay of the older generation. Some of the couple’s
companions tried to ignore the deed allowing the thing to be some sort of the
norm among their group.
First, let’s address
the definition: According to Verity Hogan, a PDA, or public display of
affection, is the term used to describe any form of physical contact between
couples in a public setting. It includes everything from kissing and cuddling
to holding hands or exchanging light touches.
Falling in love is
wonderful, and when it happens, you may want the world to know. Holding hands
and exchanging loving glances will draw a happy sigh from those who witness
these sweet signs of affection. However, being too affectionate in public shows
a lack of general etiquette skills. When you and your main squeeze make out in
front of other people, they are likely to feel extremely uncomfortable.
Mayne (2019),
mentions that public displays of affection, also known as PDAs, may elicit a
wide range of reactions from people around you. Some of the factors for
tolerance include age, social norms, and customs. If you're not sure whether or
not an action is okay in any social setting, you should probably hold off until
you are in a more private situation. Wouldn't it be nicer to have people
rooting for you rather than being embarrassed and running from you?
This phenomenon is
already happening in public schools. Aside from the alarming rate of adolescent
pregnancy, young lovers are displaying their intimacy as if it is the normal
thing to take place in such settings. They sometimes get offended when
authorities tell them to behave and will then give retorts as if the universe
is aligned to their unacceptable actions.
PDA is often
considered a public profession of how two people feel about one another.
Schools typically see this type of behavior as a distraction and inappropriate
for a school setting. Most schools have policies that forbid this type of issue
on campus or at school-related functions. Schools typically have a
zero-tolerance stance on PDA because they recognize that even innocent displays
of affection can turn into something more.
Being overly
affectionate can be offensive to many people, though a couple caught up in the
moment may not be aware that their actions are offensive. Because of this,
schools must educate their students on the issue. Respect is a critical
component of character-education programs in schools everywhere. Students who
regularly engage in acts of PDA are disrespecting their peers by subjecting
them to witnessing their affection. This should be brought to the attention of
the over-affectionate couple who were probably too caught up in the moment to
consider others who were around them (Meador, 2019).
University of Kansas
researchers asked 349 primarily straight college students, ages 17-35, about
their engagement in PDA and the reasons behind it.The number one reason people
showed PDA was "to enhance their image or status by proving they were
capable of making out with a particular person." Others wanted to
broadcast their love to the world, some were doing it for the thrill of breaking
a taboo, and a few didn't really care where they were—they just wanted to make
out and happened to be out in the open.
Psychologists offer a
range of explanations for such reactions. In very simple terms, Dr. Charles T. Hill
noted that public displays of affection force people to become an unwilling
audience. And that, he said, is discomforting.
Acculturation is also
a big factor. Filipinos open its doors to multiple cultures and with the
advent of the social media, they are exposed to different presentations of
affections through the internet. Some copy what they see.
Still, one thing is
certain, we still have our own identity and the moral fiber of our culture put
a lot of premium on decency. We expect people to do simple favors, exchange
pleasantries, show mercy, express gratitude, and volunteer for tasks because it
is just common decency—though not morally obligatory—to do so. But we also
criticize those who refuse to “elect” commonly decent “moral gifts.”
Being “different” for
the sake of it all is irresponsible. We must still conform to the societal
norms since we belong to a society which is strongly anchoring itself to such
norms. We could break the rules sometimes but we must adhere to the attainment
of the common good.
In the end, it is
only the good memories of us that count. The bad ones must be our struggles NOT
to commit.
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