Gusto ko pirme bibo, kalian kun aya. Dapat malingaw ako pirme! We
hear these statements most of the time. In fact, there are instances that these
are our own words. But have we realized lately that in reality that is
impossible? There are really instances when we have to accept the fact that
life is boring and dependent on the concepts of our definitions of what is
enjoying and boring.
The world renowned author M. Scott Peck mentioned: Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult-once we truly understand and accept it-then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.
A research team led by psychological scientist John Eastwood of York University in Ontario, Canada, define boredom as "an aversive state of wanting, but being unable, to engage in satisfying activity," which springs from failures in one of the brain's attention networks.
And what are satisfying activities? The answer depends on the inclinations and activities the person likes. Reading can be enjoying and satisfying to some but it can be boring to others. This is the reason why others “click” as friends since they share similar interests. Binge drinking and consuming drugs can be enjoying to some that is why they call themselves as “barkada”. They share similar inclinations to vices.
But is it normal to continue looking for fun? Or is there some sort of a “skip” or deficit among such people? The concept presented by Peck that acceptance of life as difficult (and boring for that matter) allows the person to transcend is a start. This is probably the proper time for the person to find meaningful activities. When he sees the activity with some meaning on it, he will start understanding that he must not just enjoy it. He has to do it.
Self-actualization (also referred to as self-realization or self-cultivation) can be described as the complete realization of one’s potential as manifest in peak experiences which involve the full development of one’s abilities and appreciation for life (Maslow, 1962).
The attainment of self-actualization involves one’s full involvement in life and the realization of that which one is capable of accomplishing.
Carl Rogers believed that for a person to achieve self-actualization they must be in a state of congruence. This means that self-actualization occurs when a person’s “ideal self” (i.e., who they would like to be) is congruent with their actual behavior (self-image).
With these proven theories, it is really a must for individuals to monitor the SELF. The actual recording of his/her thoughts is a valid activity to reflect on one’s journey. It was even presented in the Christian faith: Jesus spent around forty days to be with himself and reflect. He was even tempted with material and worldly things but was able to say NO to them.
How much happiness is welcome before it starts to seem out-of-touch, willfully naive, even a compulsive defense against reality?
Yes, it’s OK to look for fun some time. But when one looks for it ALL THE TIME, something is wrong. Probably, the person was not able to develop the ability to find meaning with his/her existence.
Let us not be bound by our own emotions. Let us be the one to control them… not the other way around.
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