Masinahon, ugsa hilabtonon! People who are envious often pull others down. Voluntarily or involuntarily, they do it so that their insecurities will be nursed. For them, talking about the failures of others will make them a bit “at ease” with their current status.
Envy is an emotion that occurs when one person wants something another person has, whether that thing is a material possession or perceived success or stature. Notable for its status as one of the seven deadly sins, envy has been studied extensively in the fields of philosophy and psychology, among others.
According to goodtherapy.org, envy develops when individuals compare themselves to others and find themselves to be inferior. This process is a natural one, although comparing the self with others may lead to the development of envy and other emotions that can cause pain.
Envy results from internal factors rather than external ones. Individuals may be more likely to experience envy if they have lower self-esteem or believe that they are lacking in some way, regardless of what they actually possess. That is the main reason why self-confidence must be developed among young people so that they will grow up to be at ease with their own strengths and confront their weaknesses in a positive manner.
There is a pressing concern about mental health which leads to self-destruction. Others equate such to depression not realizing that there are other alarming mental disorders that one must consider. When does envy becomes abnormal? This is when people see themselves less recognized than others and they do “anything” to be at par with their source of envy…or even beyond.
People with excessive recognition hunger are so worried about their own egos, that they are callous when it comes to caring about others. They want praise aimed at themselves; they are self-centered and self-serving. They will step on anyone and do almost anything in order to advance themselves and gain more recognition (Angel, 2019).
A healthy mindset of an adult aims to proceed to the highest meaning of his/her existence: to serve others. If the person continues to feed on the inadequacies of the SELF, there is a big tendency that the “adulting” process is being hampered by some psychological skews. The actions are often geared towards looking for the mistakes of others so to feign security. This is the main reason why the immature adult will then perform character assassinations to others he/she is threatened of. And that could be very unhealthy.
It is precisely the psychologically strong people who are best able to care for others. Only the most secure people can give generous compliments. Only those who receive admiration, respect and love can properly convey admiration, respect and love for others. Those who stab others at the back are the weaklings, the ones who are prone to abnormal actions to feed their insecurities.
Our tendency to constantly compare often leads to envy. These feelings can make us forget or downplay our own good experiences or draw our focus to the bad things that have happened to us in the face of other people’s happiness. People tend to think more negatively about the future after hearing someone else's good news, using a kind “defensive pessimism” to protect themselves from disappointment.
Grow up. That is not just on the physical aspect but on the psychological side as well. If we had fewer opportunities during our childhood which might be the cause of such insecurities, the world is full of them at present. Do not compare yourself to others you might get sick. Too sick you will probably do things which are universally-incorrect.
When our envy is rooted in things we cannot change about ourselves, such as a difficult childhood, a traumatic event, or certain health conditions and disabilities, using envy to motivate self-improvement is more likely to dig us deeper into frustration and self-blame (Breines, 2013).
Cultivate your own garden. Uproot the weeds and plant seeds of goodness. Utilize the time by doing something within your control and capability. You will see later that the garden will be full of flowering plants and promising buds. Take your time by doing what you can do for others to marvel in the near future with appreciation to what you have achieved.
Be contented. This is one way to be happy.
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