Humbug

Hawod. They are always right. They do not welcome suggestions. It is as if they are gifted by the universe with this capacity to rule over. In small groups, the other members will just keep quiet so that no fuss would materialize. These people are the loud and opinionated to the point that they would lash out comments to you once you air out your own opinion about the topic at hand. It is like traversing a one-way road.

An opinionated person, according to Goulston (2010) is one who speaks as if their opinions are facts rather than mere beliefs.  Being opinionated is incompatible with other people having different opinions. Dr. Nicola Davies continued that while some people like to debate ideas and opinions, others argue out of habit: – they can’t help themselves, and will make a fuss about the most trivial things, just to cause conflict. This can drive those around them up the wall because they are almost always on the defensive, even about what might seem like the most insignificant things.

In a social encounter, it is but normal to have interaction with others. We do not fail to understand that people have differing opinions and ideas on certain things. We hold on to our convictions and so are they! It is very good to have your own beliefs and ideas on certain things but it is alarming when you insist that others would believe what you think is right. It is like insisting that the most beautiful color is blue to a person who loves pink! You could discuss on the benefits of wearing blue but you should not tell the pink-lover to change his/her mind.

Linda Emma of the Bump said: What makes someone who is opinionated annoying to many isn’t that they share their opinions, but that they believe everyone else should share the same view. This egocentric philosophy can be particularly disconcerting if they are so close-minded as to deem other’s opinions and values as unworthy. If you find yourself fuming at what someone is saying, don’t do so in silence. Instead, speak up and offer another viewpoint.

As a facilitator of development programs, this writer encounters a lot of people who dominate discussions. We were being taught how to “traffic” ideas and opinions but there are personalities who could be so difficult they cause annoyance to the learning process. It is as if they are more knowledgeable than the person “on board” to the point that they underscore their ideas as brilliant ones!

When we meet these types of people, first that would come to mind is having an antisocial personality disorder. Dr. Steve Bressert said that Individuals with antisocial personality disorder frequently lack empathy and tend to be callous, cynical, and contemptuous of the feelings, rights, and sufferings of others. They may have an inflated and arrogant self-appraisal (e.g., feel that ordinary work is beneath them or lack a realistic concern about their current problems or their future) and may be excessively opinionated, self-assured, or cocky. They may display a glib, superficial charm and can be quite voluble and verbally facile (e.g., using technical terms or jargon that might impress someone who is unfamiliar with the topic).

The mayoclinic.org mentioned that personality is the combination of thoughts, emotions and behaviors that makes everyone unique. It's the way people view, understand and relate to the outside world, as well as how they see themselves. Personality forms during childhood, shaped through an interaction of inherited tendencies and environmental factors.

Ergo: nature and nurture.

We do not have the license to help them since they may have a clinical condition. To retain our peace, the best thing that we could do is stop affiliating with them. They might influence our thought patterns and attitudes. We are responsible for our mental health that is the main reason that we CHOOSE to stay away from their paths. If they are our friends and members of the family, we could support them by bringing them to the doctor. Yet, if they insist they are WELL and BETTER THAN US, (if they are adults) let them be. Again, one’s health is his or her own lookout.

The Mayo Clinic staff continues: There's no sure way to prevent antisocial personality disorder from developing in those at risk. Because antisocial behavior is thought to have its roots in childhood, parents, teachers and pediatricians may be able to spot early warning signs. It may help to try to identify those most at risk, such as children who show signs of conduct disorder, and then offer early intervention.

Early, effective and appropriate discipline, lessons in behavior modification, social and problem-solving skills, parent training, family therapy, and psychotherapy may help reduce the chance that at-risk children go on to become adults with antisocial personality disorder.

But once these people reach adulthood, we be aware of them!